"Perfection" is not just about control... It's also about letting go
When the Japanese mend broken objects, they aggrandize the damage by filling the cracks with gold. They believe that when something's suffered damage and has a history it becomes more beautiful...
Mark Divine is a former Navy Seal… he’s also got a degree in finance, could be classified as a Buddhist monk, and he now trains Navy Seals & those “average joes” wanting to become one… so it’s safe to say that he’s spent a fair amount of his time around those we’d classify as “high-achievers”... and in his world class book, the way of the seal, he states:
“there’s no such thing as perfection, only perfect effort"
personally, I’m guilty of falling into this trap - and I know for a fact that the majority of young athletes do as well… we strive for perfection as in today’s world it’s all we see
it’s what we think of as “normal”, even though this perfection can never be attained
perfectionism presents itself different ways in different people… but where do we draw the line between giving our best & trying to attain the elusive “perfection”
this next generation is being brought up in a false-reality due to the likes of social media - and they’re being taught that “perfectionism” in appearance, in habits, in results, is the norm and that it’s what they should be aiming for
when this is damaging and far from the truth
the reality to life is that there’s no such thing as perfection… there’s a fluctuation to everything done and everything we do... there's duality - so much so that we will never always be at our “perfect” bests
and if we tell this story of perfectionism to the next generation - and it alludes them, what do they think…
they cannot live up to these unrealistic expectations and begin to destroy their own self-belief… they begin to cultivate disempowering thoughts and tell themselves stories about how they’re not good enough…
or about how they need to go harder or push more… and we know more isn’t the answer
As there’s a story from Derek Sivers, multimillionaire and founder of CD Baby - whereby he used to ride his bike along Santa Monica - he’d push as hard as he could and the trip would take him 40 minutes… yet, he began associating pain, sweat, and hard work with riding his bike and began putting it off… until he one day decided to enjoy his ride, go slow, take in the views - and to his astonishment, it took him 43 minutes
was all that hard work, all that sweat/blood/tears, worth the extra 3 minutes? hell no… the push for perfection wasn’t worth it...
instead of demanding perfection from them, we should be demanding them to always be a student of life… to continually look to learn, grow, and develop themselves… to not be afraid to make mistakes… and continually learn from them
as striving for perfection is unattainable - and it can be deadly… just look at the increase in ED’s within this demographic… all because we aren’t living up to someone else “perfect, idealistic” expectations
perfection is the wrong direction… and trying to attain it is not where you should be heading
be you… not someone else's reflection of you